Then and Now

Time indeed flies!

When you are pregnant, you'd be forever puzzled on what your baby will actually look like when he/she is born. A 3D ultrasound gives you a glimpse of that look.

Weather check

When you're living here in Edmonton (or in any Canadian province / town), you won't survive without constantly checking on the current weather / weather forecast. Mahirap manghula, weather can go extremes kasi in a matter of a day or two (or hours pa nga). Puwedeng masyadong malamig, pwede rin namang "positive" (or medyo 'mainit'). Hence, you have to be prepared in braving the outdoors, especially on winter time. There are days to avoid and days to enjoy. There are times when you need lots of layering and times when one jacket is enough.

I am only using the default weather app on my iPhone and so far, I am satisfied. Madalas accurate naman siya. Oh, how I love seeing positive numbers whenever I look at it! =)

Bed regrets

'We should have bought a king-size bed,' a thought suddenly occurred to me.

I was about to take a bath when I took this picture. Ford wanted to sleep with us last night (he sleeps in the guest room on weekdays so he won't get disturbed by the baby) because he was planning to watch a movie in the laptop that I am using. However, Nathan has been sleeping with me since he got sick (Tuesday) so hindi na kami kasyang tatlo sa queen-size bed. In the end, the poor daddy went back to the guest room.

When we ordered our bed in Ethan Allen on December 2013, we did not even consider getting a king bed. Honestly, wala sa isip ko na magkaka-anak kami kaya hindi ko naanticipate. Our bedroom is also not that big kaya akala ko ok na ang queen. Now that we have a child, dapat pala talaga ay malaki. Even though Nathan has his own crib, there are times pala na dapat katabi namin siya. Malalaking tao pa naman kami.

I love our bed. It's a dream come true (haha!) kaya wala akong balak palitan siya in a decade or two. It's too expensive din para ireplace so I guess wala kaming choice na tatlo kung hindi magsiksikan. Pwede na rin, para close kami.

My little boy is sick =(

This is the worst feeling ever. My son is sick and I am miserable.

This is the first time in three months that Nathan got sick (it started last Tuesday). Common cold at cough lang naman pero as a first time mom, I can't help but be worried. As a first time mom, I had no idea what to do. Ito na nga ba ang kinatatakutan ko, ang magkasakit ang anak ko. It's so painful seeing him cough. Barado rin ang ilong sa sipon kaya nahihirapang huminga. Kawawa talaga ang babies kapag may sakit because they can't properly express how they feel. A mom could only cry.

I am thankful though na wala siyang fever. We opted not to bring him to the clinic anymore kasi wala rin naman mangyayari doon. We just bought a nasal aspirator to help him relieve his nasal congestion.

It's been four days and his condition is already a bit better. He vomited nga lang the past two days. Hay, I can't wait till this ordeal is over. I myself am sick. Hindi ko nga alam kung ako ang nanghawa kay Nathan o siya ang nanghawa sa akin (the past days medyo may pasipon-sipon na rin kasi siya). Pero hindi ko afford na isipin na masama ang pakiramdam ko. I have my son to attend to, walang ibang mag-aalaga sa kanya kundi ako (while his daddy is at work).

Anak, please get well na. Let's go broom broom na. =(

VDay 2015 with my boys

All occasions are more special now because we have this little guy who always tags around!

Valentine's Day 2015 fell on a Saturday so we really long planned on eating out. But I wasn't in the mood on the day itself, sobrang malamig kasi. I slept the whole day. However, Ford woke me up late in the afternoon and insisted that we go out.

Ford suggested that we eat at Chili's but upon checking on their menu online, I kinda 'backed out.' Sobrang namamahalan kasi ako. With a baby, hindi rin naman namin mae-enjoy ang ambiance eh.

Then I remembered Swiss Chalet. We haven't eaten there and their food seemed reasonably priced naman.

We went to their Windemere branch.

Just as I expected, there were many diners. But the restaurant is quite big and there were still many vacant tables. We had to wait for a few minutes for a booth though. Meron nga kasi kaming dalang baby.

Our order took long to arrive so we had plenty of time to take pictures.

Our server was a Filipina so nakipa-picture na rin kami.

Nathan got hungry na haha!

Here's what we ate. Ford and I each had a soup and chicken-ribs plate. In fairness, masarap naman. Hindi nga rin ganun kamahal.

Valentine's Day now has a deeper meaning because of my son. Our love story has produced a very cute offspring!

Cheers to more Valentine celebrations!

Puro snow ang paligid. I admire my husband for being so patient in bringing us out kahit na sobrang mahirap sa part niya. Thank you, Dear!

Ang sarap magtampisaw sa malinis na snow!

We went to Walmart after to buy diapers for Nathan. Haha, very unromantic! Iba na talaga ang buhay namin ngayon!

I just had to end Valentine's Day with this...

I wasn't able to give my husband a gift. It's so absurd if I buy something for him kasi using his own money haha! He asked me if I want something but I said no na rin kasi kabibili nya lang sa akin ng iPhone 6 a few days before.

I really am beyond grateful. Sa bawat okasyon na kasama na namin si Cheeky Boy, tumataba ang puso ko.

Nathan @ 3 Months!

Yey, our dear Nathan is now 3 months old!

February 13, 2015 (Friday). As usual, it was just the three of us who celebrated. Buhay-Canada hahaha!

I was happy because I thought Ford would come home late na from his field work. I was surprised that he was home already by 5pm.

My most favorite part in celebrating Nathan's monthly "birthday" is of course the cake. For this month, I just bought chocolate cup cakes from Walmart (cheap but delicious!). The candle set is from Dollar Tree. Nice noh?

And because it's a day before Valentine, I chose a cupid (also bought at Dollar Tree) as the "topper." It's the last piece so parang meant to be hehe. So kawaii!

For the first time, I cooked all of Nathan's handa. We had spaghetti, garlic bread, spring rolls, calamari, and nachos. 

I am looking forward to the day that my baby boy can blow his cake na. 

I added this for added touch of Valentine.

Again, how I wish somebody would take our family picture! Sawa na ako sa selfie/groufie eh!

Oh, Nathan! Thank you for bringing us so much joy! We are so pleased that you are such a happy baby! You never fail to smile everytime I say "peechur peechur!"

Thank you too for being so easy to take care of. You just cry whenever you want to be fed. You don't want to be carried (buti na lang because you are so heavy na -- around 14 lbs) so hindi nahihirapan si Mommy. But I admit, I miss you sleeping in my arms. You love to "broom broom" so we have no problem bringing you out. You sleep longer na rin at night (sometimes up to 10 hours, would you believe?) so I am getting my rest na rin.

Plus you remain so cute!

They say you are dad's mini-me. Hmm, fairer version nga lang hahaha!

We love you so much, Cheeky Boy! Happy 3 months! Mwah!

Happy Hearts Day!

This little guy is wishing you a Happy Valentine's Day!

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Just a thought. Someday, Nathan will have somebody to spend Valentine's Day with. Haha, I know it's not happening that soon but I am getting quite possessive as early as now. Ganun ba talaga ang mga mothers sa sons nila? I want to be the only woman in Nathan's life... haha, pwede ba yun? Oh well, I'll try to be a good mom. But I am afraid Nathan has to deal with a pakialamerang nanay later on. =)

I am prediabetic =(

I received a call from the Diabetes Center a few hours ago. I just had my postpartum 2-hour glucose test yesterday morning and they already received the result.

2-hour wait at the lab

I am "positive" for prediabetes. According to the nurse, my fasting sugar is 5.0 mmol/litre (but the med tech at the lab told me it's 4.4) but my  sugar after 2 hours of drinking the 75-gram glucose drink is 9.4 mmol/litre. Normal sugar must be below 7.7 mmol/litre. Prediabetis (or impaired glucose tolerance) is somewhere between normal glucose tolerance and diabetis (11.1 mmol/litre and above).

To be honest, I was already expecting a not so good result. Aside from having a family history of diabetes, I have a very poor eating diet. Pasalamat pa nga ako at hindi pa ako diabetic.

I was never a healthy eater to begin with. But after giving birth, my eating habit got worse. The first month after Nathan was born, I lost weight. I stayed in our bedroom (upstairs) the whole time and relied solely on what my husband will bring me to eat. I wasn't in the mood to eat too. But when I finally had the energy to go to the kitchen on my own, I ate a lot again. Mostly junk foods, those that I missed when I was pregnant (i.e. lots of rice, chocolates, chips, soda, etc.).

I did some reading and learned that the only solution (for now) for prediabetes is healthy eating and exercise. I need to lose some weight in the process. I would need to test my sugar again. Hay, parang deja vu ito noong buntis ako.

I am scheduled to meet with my Diabetes doctor again on March 9. Hay, akala ko hindi na kami uli magkikita soon.

Fresh from the mail box!

We got two nice surprises from our mail box this week!

The first one is a package from Ford's cousin Marjorie who lives in California. She sent us a belated Merry Christmas card and a Ralph Lauren onesie for Nathan. Hurray!

I love receiving thoughtful gifts! Thank you so much, Marjo! Our little boy will be wearing your gift soon!

The other is a "no-occasion" card from my girl friend (barkada) Michelle. Haha, she wasn't able to send me the Christmas card that I "demanded" from her last September kaya alam ko pambawi ito! I am surprised though because it arrived fast. She only mailed it last January 26 (Philippine time). Well I guess post offices are not busy nowadays!

Thanks a lot, Mitch!

It's a happy week for our mail box! Sana may magpadala uli soon! Hahaha! =)

Winter at Unit #99

It's winter time and this is how our humble town house looks like now...

February 1, 2015

It's been a year since we moved in here and we are grateful. This is home.

I am strong, after all.

It's been exactly two months now since my parents-in-law went back to California. They came here in October to help us with my giving birth. They were scheduled to leave on December 2 but we thought they could extend should we still need their assistance. Unfortunately, they had to go back to the States on the said schedule because they have to fix their insurance and do some jury duty.

Honestly, I was disappointed. I delivered via c-section and we badly needed them. Ford went back to work on December 1 and I was so afraid to be left alone with the baby. I was still in so much pain then. I wanted to rest, to sleep. But we had no choice. They were not my parents in the first place. I cannot impose. We had no other people to help us out and I felt so helpless.

At eighteen days postpartum, I was already taking care of Nathan on my own. It wasn't easy. Why, I only started changing his nappy and feeding him on December 1 (Ford's first day back at work)! Prior to that, it was my husband who did everything for the baby.

The first few days were hell. I slept for an average of two hours on each day and I was almost screaming from pain in my incision. I have very low tolerance for pain, I am telling you. I am a coward whenever I feel aches on my body.

Aside from that, Nathan and I got stuck on our room upstairs for weeks. I was 'forbidden' to go up and down the stairs because of my ceasarian operation so I had no choice (we have no room nor bathroom in the main floor). Everything we needed - food, water, milk, etc. - were being brought to us by Ford. There were days when I had to content myself with instant noodles for lunch because that's the only hot food I could have when my husband was at work. I lost a lot of weight as a result.

On my third "night" of taking care of Nathan, I couldn't stop him from crying. I was so tired and I ended up weeping myself. Ford, who was sleeping on the other room so he could rest well, came in and saw me and the baby crying. I hysterically told him: "Hindi ko na kaya. Hindi ko na kaya!" But of course, after he pacified the baby, I resumed on my mommy duties.

When Ford went home after work the following day, he informed me that he asked their HR if he could just go to work for half a day in the next two weeks. He reasoned that I am having a 'breakdown.' People here are so used to postpartum depression so his request was easily granted. But since he already consumed all his vacation leave, his under time would result to salary deduction.

I felt bad. The reason why Ford didn't avail of the 3-month paternity leave is because the amount that he will get from EI (or Employment Insurance) won't be sufficient to pay our mortgages and bills. A salary deduction is a big deal, given that we have so many added expenses for the baby.

But Ford's half-day-only work helped a lot in my adjustment. I was able to rest for longer hours and eat better. And though I was still in pain, I told Ford he could go back to working full hours na kahit may one week pa. Nanghinayang talaga ko sa deduction.

Two months! Two months have passed and I survived! I would like to believe that I've already experienced the worst so everything else that follows is easier. The taking-care-of-the-baby-while-in-pain is over. Nathan is almost 12 weeks now and he's sleeping longer. We've bonded so much and I already know him - his moods, his habits. It is still difficult, of course, but I am feeling a lot better now.

Face of a tired but happy mom.

Looking back, I never thought that I will make it. Even my mother was skeptic. She knows me very well so she was so worried. If only she could send a baby sitter from Pinas, she kept on saying. But I am a mother now. A mother can do everything for her child. A mother has this unexplainable strength when it comes to taking care of her offspring. I never believed it until now.

But I would not have made it without my husband. To be honest, he's still doing more of the house and baby chores than me. I am also thankful to my little boy because even though he keeps on feeding often (every 1 1/2 - 2 hours), he didn't give me any problem. He's never been sick so far and he's such a happy baby - always smiling and laughing.

Two months. Just two months. I still have a lifetime of mommy duties. But if this smile is what I'll see every day, I'll be fine. I am strong, after all!

I love you, my Cheeky Boy! Mommy ang bahala sayo! =)

Cuteness Overload

I had a first 4D glimpse of Chicklet on September 5, 2014. I admit that it made me depressed. Look at the picture, he looked so weird right?

I did some manic research again, seeking for an assurance that 4D ultrasound images are inaccurate and that my baby will look "better" in person. But my fear did not leave me, until I gave birth, I was afraid that my baby will be "ugly." An ugly ugly word, I know!

I tried to convince myself that I will love my child no matter what. I knew I will. Niloloko ko pa ang sarili ko na "patatalinuhin" ko na lang siya just in case hindi siya cute. But of course, deep inside I wanted him to be normal looking. Not good looking, just normal looking - with no major flaws and all. Hindi ko kasi kaya na tutuksuhin siya at ibu-bully later on.

But you know what, after I delivered him via C-section, the first thing I heard from the nurses was: "Oh, he's so cute!"

Really, my son is cute??? Or baka naman sinasabi lang nila yun sa lahat ng babies???

I personally find him adorable but Ford would always tease me na "nanay na nga ako," that my judgement is being clouded kasi nga anak ko ang pinag-uusapan.

But after a few days and constant affirmation, siguro nga cute talaga ang Nathan ko! I even asked my girls friends if they OBJECTIVELY find him cute. They wanted to 'spank' me for asking.

Anyway, here are Nathan's pictures for the last 11 weeks.

Newborn

Day 1

Week 1

Week 2

Week 3

Week 4

Week 5

Week 6

Week 7

Week 8

Week 9

Week 10

Week 11

Cute eh?! Pagbigyan nyo na ako please lang! =)

My son's face is not perfect but those imperfections make him look so adorable. I am super duper proud of him! Alam kong nag-iiba pa ang itsura ng mga bata and there's still a possibility that he will look 'less cute' later on. But I don't mind, I will love him all the more.

But for now, ieenjoy ko muna ang constant praises for him! #kiligmommymode